Sunday, December 21, 2008

Sleeping With Bread

The examen, based on the spiritual exercises of St. Ignatius, helps a person hold onto what spiritually nourishes them by looking at what is giving them consolation in their life or causing him desolation. It allows someone to express his gratitude to God for the good stuff and turn to him for solace for the bad stuff. It is quite simple. You simply ask yourself, in the last day/week/month what gave me consolation and what caused me desolation.

So, without further ado ...

The Good.

1. I became an Iron Butt this week! It all started back in August when my brother, Sean, and I rode our motorcycles 1174 miles in one day from Norman, Oklahoma, to Lexington, South Carolina. That was more than enough to complete the 1,000 miles in 24 hours requirement for a "Saddle Sore" Iron Butt ride. The silver Honda Silverwing in front is mine. Sean is on his Yamaha FJR.

I found out this week that my application for an Iron Butt Association ride certification was approved. My membership has also been approved and entered into the Iron Butt Association's member database. I now have an official IBA membership number and it is exceedingly cool. I have made many long distance motorcycle rides before, but none of them met the requirements for IBA memebership. More long distance trips are sure to follow, so stay tuned. I might be riding through a town near you!

2. My son came back from New York today for Christmas. It's really nice to have him back for awhile.

The Bad.

A pair of Managers in the Evil Corporation.

... So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you ...

Maybe it's just me, but as far as Rules go, this one is pretty simple and seems to work 100% of the time. That 100% of the time certainly applies when one is put into a position to supervise the work of others, especially when dealing with our younger employees who need the same sort of compassion and mentoring that You managers received when you were starting out.

If an employee works full time, raises a family, maintains a marriage, AND goes to graduate school at night with her own money, HOW DARE YOU tell her that earning a technical Master's Degree won't do anything to help her do her job any better and that she should go on and get a SECOND Master's Degree (an MBA) because that might, possibly, one day, maybe mean something. If you've got something to say about her performance, by God, be man enough to just say it. Otherwise, be decent enough to recognize that determination, perservence and grit it took to achieve what she did. If you can't recognize an employee's legitmate achievements and accomplishments in their working life, then get the Hell out of MY corporation. Yes, it's MY corporation too!

If an employee accomplishes her assigned duties satisfactorily, AND performs additional duties for our superior organization, AND recieves public recognition and awards for her service, AND earns a particular "Engineer of the Year" award for our part of the Evil Corporation, then please tell why she was given exactly the same annual performance assessment as last year when she was still considered a trainee. Better yet, have the decency to tell HER what she actually has to do to earn even a smidgeon of a better performance assessment. HOW DARE YOU not tell her anything at all like that. What the Hell do you mean that you don't know what it is that she can do to earn more points on that assessment? You wrote the thing.

The Evil Corporation uses a very strange method of evaluating employee performance. To be sure, this method has some potential for positive change in the system. The problem is that in order for that positive, as small as it is, to be realized, Managers must have a spine, guts, heart, brains or whatever organ is the seat of justice, honesty, and decency in the human body. I'm afraid it sets the bar too high to ask that Managers have the courage to simply talk to people.

I've never asked anyone to be perfect. I know that's not possible. I've fallen short of that mark so many times my knees and elbows are literally covered with scars. That's the beauty of this Golden Rule thing. We don't have to be perfect. All we have to do is treat each other the way we want to be treated, and THAT is something I can do. It's something that YOU can do too. Will we always get it right? Hell NO! But think of all the countless times we will get it right for times we stumble and fall. It's worth doing and you know it's the right thing to do. So let's do it - starting right now!

What makes me saddest is that we are going to lose both of these employees.

Maybe that defines the difference between Management and Leadership. Maybe it just goes to show that some people have no sense of shame or decency in them.

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Corona Discharge

Today I was leaving work late at usual and heard the most interesting thing. You know that great scene in the old Frankenstien movie when Dr. Frankenstien is going to use the power of electricity to reanimate the monster? All that sizzling snap and crackle as the monster's body went up into the castle tower? That is precisely the sound I heard.

A terrible, wet fog hung over the place. It was so loaded with water that you had to pull hard against it just to breathe. It was still, cold and heavy turning all the sodium lights into fuzzy gumball smears.

I followed my ears to the source of the sizzling arcs. A high tension electrical line, very high up on poles runs across the street from my building. The science of what I saw is pretty cool, but just seeing it happen was really something. An area around the lines would build up a blue and purple glow, then pop with a crackle and dim a little, but not be gone. Then another place would begin to glow.

This picture doesn't do any of it justice, but you kind of see how the pole and the line were glowing. It was supremely cool.

Here is what they say about the science of it:
The electric field contains enough electricity to ionize the air. Specifically, it will ionize oxygen and nitrogen in the air. This can produce a low energy plasma, the corona discharge. A plasma is a fourth state of matter (after solid, liquid, and gas). It is like a gas or liquid, but molecules are separated into atoms, and the outer electrons are stripped off and are freed into the plasma. In comparison, the sun is essentially a big ball of very hot plasma.

The current carried in the power line alternates direction, usually 60 times a second (60Hz). This propagates to the electrical field, affecting the plasma, and producing the audible vibration of air.

Will be back to the questions and answers soon.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Answer #4

Question #4. Leah asks "Which Harry Potter character are you most like? and if you haven't read Harry Potter, then I'm doing a male version of your question to me: Are you more Kirk or more Spock?"

Answer #4. I've got all the Harry Potter novels on the shelf! My son loved the stories and so did I. Which of the characters am I most like?

Well, it couldn't be Harry. I like academic challenge and sports same as Harry, but Hogwarts isn't ready for someone with the physique of an offensive lineman flying around the Quidditch field on a broom.

As much as I like Severus Snape, he and I are different people altogehter for the same reason that Albus Dumbledore and I are different persons. They don't get the girl. (That being said, I'll never be able to see Professor Snape without picturing Leah nearby. Ron Weasley gets the girl, but doesn't get the academics or sports so that's a bust too.

The one person I really identify with is the late blooming Neville Longbottom.

Neville has a tough start in life, but he finds his way eventually in academia and eventually becomes a Herbology professor. Through "Dumbledore's Army", he gains his confidence and becomes the person he wants to be. He has to get tested in battle first, but comes through nicely. Best of all, he wins over the beautiful Hannah Abbott, a Hufflepuff knockout, they marry and live together over a pub, the Leaky Cauldron.

Can anyone tell me how life gets better than that?

Saturday, December 13, 2008

Answer #3

Question #3. Leah gets the first of her questions answered this evening. She would like to know about my first kiss? Where, who, anything about it?

Answer #3. Oh my, this goes all the way back to second grade. We lived about as far out in the country in southeastern Colorado as one could possibly get without being closer to some other town. Our nearest neighbor, old Mr. Kelley, was a farmer same as us. He had the same sort of luck at farming as did most everyone in that part of the world (bloody awful). He did have one treasure that he valued above all others - his three daughters.

The eldest daughter was the smart one. She wore thick glasses and had "academic curves"; that is, the rounded shoulders of someone who clutched books too close to her chest too tightly and too often, the thick and sturdy middle that comes with preferring pastry to P.E., and the smile of a angel too bashful to share.

The middle daughter was the strong one. She wore skirts that touched her ankles so that no one would ever forget that her mother had given birth to three girl babies, not just two. This daughter could run, jump and throw, and was singularly un-afflicted by beauty. She inherited every mustachioed crumb of East German Olympian (shot put) in her family tree. If the tractor broke down and the horses tired, she could pull the plow by herself.

The Angels themselves decorated the youngest daughter, Christie, with beauty and elegance, but left her as fragile as glass. Her skin had to be hidden from the Sun because she was as pale as the wind driven snow. She had hair that touched the middle of her back and was the color of the wheat fields the week before harvest. From time to time she would lift her dark glasses and let the boys look into her amethyst eyes with which she froze them still as statues where they stood. She was the first girl that ever made us say, WoW!

One day my mom needed to buy some milk, so we went to visit Mr. Kelley. He had an old Guernsey that give milk so thick and rich that the cats had to scratch through the cream just to get a drink. While the grown ups were in the big house talking, I was outside rousting chickens and playing with the dogs. Christie and the middle daughter came out to play. Christie was a year older than I was and her sister was two more than that.

Her parents didn't let Christie come out of the house very often and I just wanted to be near her. So I asked her what game she wanted to play. She said, "If you catch me, you can kiss me." Then she raised her glasses and winked at me. I couldn't move! For a minute I thought I had just wished those words into being. Then she ran off, laughing out loud, with her sister sprinting ahead and the dogs trailing behind.

I tried a few permutations of the words she said, trying to find some combination of them that made more sense than "If you catch me, you can kiss me." The world just doesn't work that way. I mean really! How often do you find money on the ground, or get free ice cream, or collect enough empty Coca Cola bottles to redeem for a candy bar, or have the object of your earthly desires ... just lay it out there like that? Couldn't be real.

That's when I saw them round the corner of the milking barn and disappear. What if it wasn't real and I just ran up to her, caught her and kissed her anyway? Sure, it was bold, but ... what if? She would slap me for sure, probably knee me in the groin, and might even call her sister over to whoop me, but you know, it didn't seem that bad when you thought about it more. I could take a black eye home with me AND still have that kiss from her and no one could make me give it back!

So I started running. I looped through the barn and over the corrals and saw them head toward the haystack. The whelping dogs were going to guide me on victory. I pumped my arms and drove my legs as hard as they would go, and I was gaining ground on all of them.

We ran around the biggest, tallest haystack in the world once and started in for a second. I rounded the corner closest to the house and heard those dogs running straight on from the other side. I came out of the turn and saw Christie and the dogs making a beeline toward the hay meadow. The knee deep grass there would slow them down considerably. This wasn't going to be easy, but it was within reach now.

All of the sudden and arm reached out of the haystack and hooked me hard under the chin. My head stopped, but my feet went up into the air, and at that moment when no more motion was going to happen, gravity yanked me down onto a hay bale and crushed the air out of me.

I struggled to catch my breath and a face appeared over me. It was the middle daughter, puckering up. She held me down and kissed me. I thought I would die from lack of oxygen. The air eventually came back, and she kept on kissing. You know, as long as my eyes were closed, it wasn't too bad really. In fact I kind of liked it. The more she kissed, the more I liked it actually. Then she started liking it too, and it was really, really good. That's when both of us began to worry.

My Mother had told me a story about a dread molecule ... that boys had inside of them that was exceedingly dangerous.

This molecule would leave the boys body and enter a girls body and make them pregnant. The molecule had power, and people were supposed to be afraid of it. And I was. I didn't even know where the molecule was at inside of me. Mom hadn't told me how this evil molecule escaped from the boys body in the first place, and I had never thought to ask before that very moment. Another thing I needed to ask was ... what happened next? Would I even know if the molecule had left my body? If so, how bad would it hurt? Would I need surgery or stitches to repair the wound it made when it escaped? Exactly what kind of damage would this molecule do to me after it was done with the girl ... and it wanted to climb back inside of me?

The middle daughter and I never spoke of ... atoms or molecules ever again. It was just too scary.

My mom and I never talked about the molecule after that, but the time it was "time" to talk about that, I had already seen the sex education film at school and learned that people have babies the same way that farm animals do ... only without the veterinarian.

Mr. Kelley's eldest daughter went to the University, got a degree in Industrial Engineering and came back to southeastern Colorado to run a commercial bakery. It was her dream job.

The middle daughter went to Colorado State University on an athletic scholarship.

Christie disappeared when her family quit farming and moved to the city during the economic catastrophe of the late 70's. She had lots of boyfriends, none of which were me.

Sam Wins!!!

Ladies & Gents, the news is out. Sam Bradford won the Heisman Trophy!!!

Couldn't have happened to a nicer guy.

Friday, December 12, 2008

Hopeful Friday

Sorry to pre-empt the questions and answers, but just got some news that I thought you all might enjoy hearing. Back in October, we had a bon voyage party for a colleague who was travelling to India to pick up a baby that she and her husband had adopted from a Church orphanage.

She is back now and the baby has recovered from jetlag the long flight across the ocean. Everyone had to take a turn at holding her. By the time this poor fellow got a chance to hold her, she was completely worn out from too much attention.

Best wishes to the happy family - Father, Mother and Child.

Tuesday, December 09, 2008

Answers #1 and #2

Question #1. Terri asks what is my "Favorite female body part"?

Answer #1. This is not what I thought the first one would be. Yes, dear, I do picture you smiling, an evil laugh one a moment away, rubbing your hands together with devilish glee.

Well, a promise made is a debt unpaid, so as I write this check, please allow me to visualize my favorite female form and all the rest. The night is young and the skies are clear ... so if you want to go dancing dear ... put your hand in mine, those long slender fingers, and see me smile. I'd bow just to get a look at those legs that go all the way to the ground. You'd smile and say, "I'm up here" and yes, you are. I'd pull you close, hip to hip, and take you for a little dip. As my hand moved from your waist to wonderfully warmer climes, you'd pull it back and say, "I'm up here" and yes, you are. As we move across the floor, cheek to cheek, you can tell at a glance what a night this is for romance. You can hear dear Mother Nature murmuring low "Let yourself go", and sometimes you will, but this time you won't. You want to catch your breath, but you catch me instead ... coz the ... ahem ... girls ... jiggle with every breath, and you say, "I'm up here" and yes, you are. When I kiss your pillow soft lips, just say to me "It's delightful, it's delicious, it's delectable, it's delirious." That's when you pull me close and say, "I'm up here" and I'd look into your eyes, your beautiful eyes and know that yes, you are. And that would be my favorite part.

Question #2. Harshita would love to know how I and the Sunshine of my life met for the first time?

Answer #2. There aren't many girls who are interested in computers and engineering. We met in that context. We studied the same things at the university. We worked in the same place. We saw each other everyday, so we talked. She was interesting, above average in so many ways, and singularly spectacular in several more. She is pretty, and when she smiles, Miss Sunshine is radiant.

When the time came, I had no idea how to ask her, how to tell her, how to let her know how I felt. One day she said something to me that I would never forget. Maybe it was an accident, or an on purpose (coz she's really good at those), or a misunderstanding. I knew that I had to say something to her right then. Didn't know what to say, and that's when my old friend Cole Porter stepped in.

I told her that I had a song I'd like her to hear. Of course that was some time ago and we didn't have this YouTube video format available then, so I had to do it the old fashioned way. With real music, you know. She thought it was a little strange, but was willing to try. Here it is ...

If you could have seen the look on her face as the lyrics passed by.

And that's why birds do it ... (she didn't know what to make of it)
bees do it ... (a tiny WTF)
Even educated fleas do it ... (a quick questioning look at me)
Let's do it ... (a jaw dropping shocker, thought i was going to be slapped actually)
Let's fall in love.

She smiled and so did I as I shook my head up and down.

That's the important stuff anyway. It was a long time ago and "we" have been "us" ever since. And Cole Porter, God rest his soul, is still our friend.

Monday, December 08, 2008

Ask Skeeter - 30 questions, 30 answers

Howdy All!

After giving the matter some serious consideration, I've decided to pick up the gauntlet that Leah threw down. If ya'all will be so kind as to ask me 30 questions, I will answer them. That's right ladies and germs ...

30 questions & 30 answers!

Some people have laid down a few rules for this adventure, so will I. Please try not to ask more than a couple of questions at a time. That way everyone gets a chance. On the other hand, feel perfectly free to ask more questions at different times though. I'll answer the first 30 questions, but after that I need to stick a fork in it coz its done. I'll try to answer your queries as completely and honestly as my dark, devious heart permits.

OK, kids, give me your best shot!

Sunday, December 07, 2008

Sleeping With Bread

The examen, based on the spiritual exercises of St. Ignatius, helps a person hold onto what spiritually nourishes him by looking at what is giving him consolation in his life or causing him desolation. It allows someone to express his gratitude to God for the good stuff and turn to him for solace for the bad stuff. It is quite simple. You simply ask yourself, in the last day/week/month what gave me consolation and what caused me desolation.

So, without further ado ...

The Good.

We just found out (officially) that our beloved Sooners will play for another National Championship in football. I live in Norman and the mood here is jublilant. We have played for four National Championships since 2000 and our record isn't the best. We won one and absolutely got smoked in the rest. Well, this is how we live and die in Oklahoma - Crimson and Cream.

My Son is attending the University of Rochester and is on the school Swim Team. He was born in Norman Regional Hospital and lived his first two years in married student housing on the campus University of Oklahoma. Unfortunately, OU doesn't have a swim team. Our arch rivals, the University of Texas, Texas A&M University and the University of Missouri all do though.

Miss Sunshine. I love you more than I can say.

The Bad.

Stress. These last few weeks have difficult.

Yes, the dental drill. Woe was me ... ouch!

Stupid people who litter. Please pick up your soiled baby diapers and dispose of them properly. It's not THAT hard!

Friday, December 05, 2008

Thursday, December 04, 2008


Have you ever opened a fortune cookie and found two fortunes inside? Sunshine and I were out for lunch and I got lucky ... twice.

Oh come on! I didn't mean it THAT way.

Srsly u guys ... u guys ... srsly ... we r for realsies ... I think

Tuesday, December 02, 2008

New Kid in Town

Hi! At long last, the first images of my newest nephew, Connor, have arrived. Here was the first one I opened.

The other ones included a sleeping Daddy-O, three of the classic Mommy's "Please God don't take my picture while I'm delivering a baby!" shots, and a host of angry young man pictures.

Really now, wouldn't you be angry if some doctor had pulled you into this world ... by your head ... with forceps?

Saturday, November 29, 2008

Comfort Food

Bedlam! Tonight is the night. Our beloved Sooners will battle our toothless, redneck Cowboy cousins from Stillwater. The tickets are practically impossible to get, but I have an extra for you if you'd like to come. How? We have an expression for it here ... even blind hogs root acorns. Sometimes you just get lucky.

Before the big game, it's time for some comfort food. When in Stillwater, Oklahoma, there is only one choice for that - Chili cheese fries at Eskimo Joe's, that jumpin' little juke joint just a block and change from the stadium.

I didn't get a good picture of it, but there is a weird snow/mud combination overshoe and boot thing that people are wearing up here around campus. Now, I appreciate individual expression and that sort of thing, but this is one of the stupidest things of all time. Shoes this ugly are ... birth control devices! Friends should not let friends be this stupid.

The place has been here forever and it's patchwork history really shows.

On the inside, it's plenty cozy, warm and fun. The beer flows to be sure, and the menu here is great, but the shirt shop is the real gem. Be sure to get a souvenir.

Something is always going on at Eskimo Joe's. Check out the website or call ahead.

When our good old comfort food arrived, it was GREAT! It covered an entire oversize dinner plate too. It is just plain good every time I come here. Let's eat and then get over to the stadium. We're gonna need a little extra time coz we're gonna have to climb all the way up to the stratosphere to find our seats.

Just in case anyone asks when you visit Stillwater, please remember that the difference between Culture and Agriculture is 90 short miles; that is, the distance between the University of Oklahoma in Norman and the campus of Oklahoma State University in Stillwater. Boomer Sooner! Go Sooners!

It has been one helluva fortnight kids. "It is by going down into the abyss that we recover the treasures of life." Joseph Campbell said that and he was right. In all that darkness, how do you actually find these "treasures of life"? Simply enough he went on to say, "Where you stumble, there lies your treasure." Miss Sunshine, how much longer do we have to keep tripping over each like this? It's you. It's always been you. You are my heart, my love and my greatest treasure.

Will you have some chili cheese fries with me ... again?

Monday, November 24, 2008


Life is supposed to be happy and full of Sunshine. Mine isn't. Going to sign off and follow the Sun.

Thanks for stopping by.

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Grabbafruds - Get 'Em While They Last

Have you ever had a hankering for some ... Dragonfruit?

This is a tough itch to stratch. Almost NO ONE carries Dragonfruit. They are small, mildly sweet, kinda citrusy, dense, wonderful and terribly expensive little jewels. They are the seed pod of a very interesting climbing cactus that grows well Southeast Asia and the Phillipines.

So I got on the phone and went hunting. Eventually, a person who could barely speak English told me that this really big Asian food store on the south side of the city had lots of "Grabbafruds" that were "cheappie, you like" and agreed that it was "no problem" and then hung up.

So I went to the store to buy some of the rare and surprisingly cheap "Grabbafruds".

There was produce everywhere.

There were some bananas and their freakish large cousins, the Plantain.

In case you didn't know, Plantains were invented by Satan himself. Mrs. Skeeter once sent me to the store to buy some bananas. I saw these really big green "bananas" and bought a bunch of them. I thought she would be most impressed by my superior hunting and gathering skills. There were plenty of them, so I picked one off the bunch, peeled it open and took a bite. That's when I discovered that some wicked force had invented a banana that tasted like a potato. Yuck!

There is also food items that one would never find in the local grocery store, like these chicken feet. Actually, they're not too bad with a nice long, slow cook with butter, garlic, and some spice.

And here is the world's greatest, most tasty hot sauce. This stuff is hot, but it has a bright, tangy tomato and pepper flavor that really satisfies. Gotta have that kicking chicken to be genuine too!

After searching the store, I found an employee and asked where the "Grabbafruds" were. She lead me back to a multiple pallet display of puffy green grapefruits that were marked way, way down. The swarm of fruit flies meant that these "Grabbafruds" wouldn't be on the floor much longer either. I asked her about the Dragonfruit and after a couple of passes at the word, she said the truck didn't bring any this week.

No Dragonfruits for me. No "Grabbafruds" either!

Thursday, November 13, 2008

New Nephew!

I have a brand new nephew! Little Connor is the first child for my brother, Sean, and his wife, Dawn.

Mum and youngun are doing well and resting in a hospital in Kansas. Daddy-O is a profoundly sleep deprived, nervous wreck.

More to follow.

(I know you read this Sean. More to follow ... means it is OK for YOU to send ME a picture of that brand new boy.)

Since I don't have a picture of Connor, here is a picture of his daddy. It is the only one that I have handy. I believe this may be last motorcycle tour photo that is taken of Sean for the foreseeable future.

Monday, November 10, 2008

Thank you Lavinia!

Many, many thanks to my blog friend, Lavinia Ladyslipper, for this beautiful award.

Please stop by her blog and say "Hi!". She always has wonderful images and great writing.

Thanks again, Lavinia. I really appreciate it.

Sunday, November 09, 2008

Buffalo Wings

While in Buffalo, New York, we had the chance to visit the home of the original buffalo chicken wings, the famous Anchor Bar.

We arrived at the end of the lunch rush and the small parking lot was full. After a few laps through the lot, we finally got a spot and got in line to have a bite to eat. The creator of the buffalo wing dish, Teressa Bellissimo, greeted us.

We got a double order of the wings with a medium sauce. The wings were very large and meaty. I had a hard time fitting the image of the huge plate into the lens of my cell phone camera. The sauce was perfect.

The wings were served with a dipping sauce that tasted like a combination of real buttermilk ranch dressing with bleu cheese crumbles and fresh ground pepper. It was wonderful.

The store has a small gift shop for souvenirs. It's a near her ...

I think we will visit this place again. It's only a few minutes on clear roads from the Buffalo airport. The food was really great and the building full of fun stuff to see. On the down side, the parking was difficult and the wait staff indifferent.

Wednesday, November 05, 2008

U of R Swimming

This weekend Mrs. Skeeter and I went to Rochester, New York, to see our son. He is swims for the the University of Rochester. They have a very nice swim facility there and the academics are excellent. The blurry mascot on the left is Rocky, a yellowjacket.

They were having the first swim meet of the season. Here is our son at the last turn in a close race.

And the second place finishing touch ...


Hey everybody! We have a new President-elect. A new era begins in January 2009 when Barack is sworn into office.

Here's some cake. Don't hesitate to have a big ole bite either, we made history and it's time to celebrate. I'm going to dash over to the Wild Onion Cafe and get some punch. Be right back.

Sunday, November 02, 2008

Back Home Again

Mrs. Skeeter and I went to Rochester, New York, to visit our son at the University. Here's an image I shot in the airport in Detroit. Am unpacking now, will post tomorrow.

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Travelling again

Obama Pictures and McCain Pictures

Going to New York tomorrow. Will stay in touch. Be back Sunday, kiddos. No PARTIES! No Strangers in the house and no loud music. I don't want to come back here and find a bunch of beer cans on the lawn and toilet paper in the trees ... like last Halloween.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

For Suzanne

more animals

You're right, Suzanne. Humane is the way forward.

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

RIP Gopher

I went out this morning to check the "surprise" under the blue box. I pushed back the dirt that sealed the edges and pulled off the frost covered blue box, and ...

I have only five words for rodents in my flower beds ...

Skeeter Über Alles, gopher Weibchen!

A few of you asked how I get rid of the pocket gophers. You definitely don't need dynamite like they used on Caddyshack. I use the Death Clutch Gopher Trap. They have NEVER failed me. I've been using them for 8 years now, and other than the one that just wore out, and the one that got "lost", they haven't let me down.

These traps aren't "for dummies". The spring is very strong and the jaws are sharp. Read and follow the directions to set the trap. Wear gloves and be safe around this device.

I tie a short rope to the loop end of the handle and then place a small weight on the other end of the rope. I like to place the trap well into the gopher tunnel, so only the gopher will be trapped. I cover the tunnel entrance and the rope with a small, brightly colored plastic bin so that it can easily be seen (and avoided), and that dogs and cats won't catch the gopher's scent and be tempted to investigate the tunnel while the trap is active.

The trap will develop a little rust in moist environments. The rust brushes off easily with a wire brush. That's all the long term maintenance I've ever had to do on these traps and they just keep on working whenever I need them.

I bought mine at a local hardware store. They are also available on the Internet through Amazon.

Sunday, October 26, 2008


Went outside to get the yard squared away for the winter and found this in the flower bed by my door. This mounds was about a foot tall and swamped the Irises.

The Gophers are back. My new neighbor said that she found a mound by her garage, but I couldn't trace the dirt back to any tunnels. She hasn't had any other trouble since then ... because they've moved under my house!

Of course, this means war.

The dirtiest, nastiest kind of war ... Gopher WAR!